Divorce Pranks - First Wives Club; Don't Get Mad, Get Even!

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Men are not the only

deadbeats.
mrsbeat_s.gif (18980 bytes)

"She" can be one too!

When you look at the deadbeat sites, ask yourself if you're behaving like a deadbeat, and remember that men are victims of  "her" deadbeat  mentality also.

Whether you are a custodial parent, a non-custodial parent, a first wife, a second wife, a girlfriend, a boyfriend, ask yourself if you're behaving in the best interest of the child.

'96 10yo ss had been begging his dad, his dad's friends, strangers, on a camping trip that someone help him to live with his dad.  Ss claims he wants to talk to the judge.

In mediation ss doesn't tell the mediator he wants to live with his dad. '96 court improved visitation. 

A couple of months later ss is sobbing over the phone.  His mother had told him his opinion didn't matter and he wasn't supposed to say anything to the mediator.  Dh says with a little exasperation, "They wouldn't have asked for your opinion if it didn't matter." 

Concerned stepmom 

 

'96 Judge said in court, “…and I sit here right now thinking how sad this all is.  It truly is.  It's sad for me and sad for the people who are nodding (dh). How terribly, awfully sad it must be for (ss).  It really upsets me that a 10-, 11, perhaps now 12-year-old boy would have to go through this, watch this, hear about this, suspect that all this is going on.” “…This (the 1990 order that bm’s attorney drew up) is a terrible order.  This is an atrocious order.”  “I have only heard from one side of this case really, and I feel so sorry for (dh) as I hear from his side.  I have not heard words from (bm's) mouth. She certainly has the privilege against self-incrimination, the right to remain silent…But even having heard just from (dh), there is no doubt in my mind that the former (bm) was terribly uncooperative about visitation, was terribly disrespectful of (dh) as a dad, did take opportunities to make things tough from him, to obstruct contact between (dh) and his son, and that is tragic."

Judge was unable to find her in contempt cuz of the vagueness of the visitation order. He worked for 2 days with dh and bm to get ironclad visitation order, amidst their own lawyer screaming at bm and her parents to shut up.  

To bm's chagrin Judge only orders dh to pay @$3000 of the @$12,000 in her attorney fees. Our '99 attny explains that was a slap on the hand to bm. She didn't get it. 

'99 Dh is in court regarding bm's visitation denial. Bm is representing herself. I believe bm and her parents believe they could do a much better job than their '96 attorney did.  

Bm  requests that visitation be reduced further cuz "son is spending too much time with his dad." Judge is quiet, looking down. The entire court waits quietly for the judge to say something. He finally looks up and says, "If I appear stunned, it's because I'm only now realizing my history with this case." He takes 5 more minutes to read past and current papers.  He says, "Ok, I'm caught up now" glaring at bm as she requests again that visitation be reduced. The judge sternly says, "The evaluator will take care of that."

Back in court, our attorney is very surprised to hear the judge say, "I read the report as soon as I received it." The judge asks both sides to have their say. Then the judge gently tells bm that he's giving dh custody (summer '99).

Bm's in shock. She and her mother sit on a bench, we sit on a different bench beside them. We can hear bm telling her mother that she wants ss to continue going to the school near her - an hour one way drive from our home.

That didn't happen.

Dh and I sit at the long end of the cafeteria. Bm and her mother sit outside the cafeteria, far from us. Our attorney walks to their table to negotiate the visitation order.  He comes back to our table. A few minutes later I watch grandma get up, walk all around the cafeteria to enter at the door beside us, and slowly walk closely past our backs to eavesdrop.

*shrug* No skin off our nose.

Concerned stepmom

Google
dh - darling husband
bm - biomom
ss - stepson
sd - stepdaughter
dd - darling daughter
ds - darling son
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